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One year ago I a lost my best friend and all the photography dreams we had together. What now?
One year ago, I experienced a profound loss when I lost my best friend and partner in crime in photography. We had shared countless dreams and aspirations in the realm of capturing moments and telling stories through our lenses. Our photography journeys were intertwined, and I felt lost without their creative spirit and companionship. However, in the midst of grief, I decided to embark on a journey of self-discovery and find new ways to keep our shared photography dreams alive. Through channeling my emotions into my art and seeking solace in the beauty of the moments I captured, I found a new path forward. This blog aims to explore the journey of healing and reinventing oneself in the face of loss, while pursuing photography as an eternal tribute to a dear friend.
One Year Ago I Lost My Best Friend and All the Photography Dreams We Had Together: What Now?
A Devastating Loss
Today is the 11th of September, marking the one-year anniversary of the tragic passing of my best friend. His unexpected death left a profound void in my life, especially since we were inseparable partners in our photography projects for the past 15 years. Together, we embarked on numerous creative endeavors in Africa, Asia, and other fascinating locations.
The Cube Project: Our Artistic Masterpiece
One of our most notable projects was the Cube Project, a massive two-meter by two-meter camera obscura. Within this unique structure, we built a rail system to focus and utilized a giant Nikon 890mm lens. This lens allowed us to create direct positive images on InfraChrome, resulting in large one-meter by one-meter Polaroid-like prints.
The image quality achieved by this process was unparalleled, far surpassing the typical Polaroid quality. The Cube Project was an exhilarating endeavor, and we dedicated approximately 13 years to its development. Starting October 6th, an exhibition showcasing these extraordinary images will be held at the Cone Store House in Murano. If you find yourself in the area, I encourage you to visit and experience these captivating photographs firsthand. Feel free to contact me, and I would gladly accompany you and provide additional insights.
Coping with Loss and Photography Challenges
This video serves not only as an invitation to the Murano exhibition but also as an opportunity to openly share three significant challenges I have faced over the past 12 months.
The First Struggle: Losing a Close Friend
This past year marked my first experience with such a profound loss. Losing someone who was not only a friend but also a piece of my soul has left an agonizing void, like a black hole that cannot be filled.
The Second Struggle: My Photography Partner
Working solely with Christian on my photography projects, we nurtured countless shared ideas and ventured into projects that others might consider crazy or impractical. Whenever one of us proposed an outlandish concept, we would wholeheartedly support each other. Whether it was traveling to Mongolia to capture stunning cloud formations or creating a giant camera, we embraced each other’s enthusiasm wholeheartedly.
Now, with Christian gone, I find myself without a partner who shares my vision and passion for photography. It has become increasingly challenging to find someone with whom I can work harmoniously and share the same creative mindset. This uncertainty worries me, and at times, I contemplate giving up photography altogether.
The Third Struggle: Life after our Collaboration
Christian and I had always planned to showcase our work together. Unfortunately, his passing has created conflicts among our friends and family regarding how to proceed with exhibiting our joint photographs. As I try to mediate between the parties involved, it becomes apparent that finding a resolution is an arduous task. The tension has escalated to a point where it disrupts my sleep and mental well-being. Consequently, it appears that the Murano exhibition may be the last opportunity to enjoy our collaborative work for many years.
The Legacy of the Cube Project
While facing these challenges, I remain proud of the work Christian and I accomplished together. The Cube Project brought us great joy, and its impact on our lives cannot be overstated. The extraordinary images we captured with this unique camera truly exemplify our passion for artistic photography.
Whether it was shooting on medium-format film or printing on Lambda, every image is a single direct positive. Unfortunately, the paper and chemicals necessary for this specialized process are no longer available, rendering these images truly one-of-a-kind. Over the years, we managed to develop approximately 200 breathtaking photographs using this technique.
As an artist and a person who thrives on creativity, I currently find myself lost. I view this situation as an opportunity to find myself once again, just as I have in the past. However, the journey forward feels like an uphill battle, filled with failures and attempts at new projects. I hold hope that in the coming years, I will discover a path that allows me to honor Christian’s work and find inspiration and purpose within the world of photography once more.
I apologize for the lengthy video, but if you find yourself in the area, I would genuinely appreciate your visit. And now, I will allow this three-minute video to unfold, serving as a poignant conclusion to this introspective reflection.
FAQ – One Year After Losing my Best Friend and Photography Dreams
A1: Coping with such a loss can be challenging, but here are a few suggestions:
- Allow yourself to grieve and process your emotions.
- Reach out to loved ones for support and talk about your feelings.
- Consider seeking professional counseling or therapy.
- Engage in activities that bring you joy and help you heal, such as photography, even if it’s different from your previous plans.
- Honor your friend’s memory by continuing to pursue your passion for photography and channeling your emotions into your work.
Q2: Are there any resources or communities for photographers dealing with bereavement?
A2: Yes, there are several online communities and support groups specifically for photographers coping with loss. Here are a few suggestions:
- Visit photography forums or Facebook groups where you can connect with fellow photographers, share your experiences, and find support.
- Explore photography-related grief support websites or blogs that provide coping strategies and personal stories from others who have faced similar circumstances.
- Consider attending photography workshops or retreats focused on healing and self-expression through art.
Q3: Can I still pursue photography without my best friend?
A3: Absolutely! Even though your friend may no longer physically be with you, their influence and the memories you shared can continue to inspire your photography journey. Keep their spirit alive in your work and use photography as a way to honor their memory. You may also discover new opportunities and perspectives by venturing into different types of photography or collaborating with other photographers who can become valuable friends and mentors.
I hope you find useful my article One year ago I a lost my best friend and all the photography dreams we had together. What now?, I also recommend you to read my other posts in my blog at this link.
If you need help with anything join the community or do not hesitate to contact me.
Best of luck! and follow your passion.
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